Incredibly long version.

My name is Anna David and I enjoy taking photos where I rest my chin on a hand. In 1999, I was an unemployed dog walker. Yes, you could argue that walking a dog was technically employment but when you’re paid $10 a day to clean up after a dog, it’s hard to convince anyone that you’re actually a writer (especially when you’re a cat person).

But really, the best way for you to get to know me may be through the timeline I’ve created below.

TIMELINE:

1977: Found out the youngest book author was younger than me and got depressed (true)

1980: Started submitting to children’s publications (and getting rejected)

1991: Got an internship at Hartford Monthly magazine during last minute panic that I had no work experience and would never get hired after graduating college

1991: Started writing restaurant reviews for the college paper due to same panic

1991: Resurrected the defunct college literary magazine and became its editor (the panic made me very productive!)

1992: Interned at Mirabella magazine 

1992: Read my college boyfriend's screenplay, Good Will Hunting, and thought it was pretty good but gave him some notes. Five years later, no one was more shocked than I was when it won him the Oscar for best screenplay and he became the biggest movie star of our generation

1992: Graduated from college and heard from my childhood friend Mackenzie that Entertainment Weekly paid its interns. Got hired as an intern at EW and promptly did nothing to take advantage of the opportunity by proving myself to editors and instead worked on scamming premiere invites off of them

1993: Was a bridesmaid in Mackenzie's wedding to her co-worker at DE Shaw and felt sad for her two years later when her new husband Jeff decided they should move to Seattle to sell books online

1992: Did not buy stock in their fledgling company, Amazon, because who would buy anything online?

1993: Became an editorial assistant at Parenting magazine in San Francisco, and spent three years writing articles on things like how breastfeeding can crack your nipples and the awesomeness of Barney the Dinosaur

1996: Moved to Los Angeles and became a full-time freelancer (only a semi oxymoron) at People magazine

1997: Fired from People magazine despite not having a real job there 

1998-2000: Got up to nothing good and did a s*itload of cocaine

May, 2000: Got sober, entire life changed and landed a high-profile job as a columnist

2002: Wrote a story for Playboy magazine that featured photos of me in such limited clothing that my mother was forbidden from looking at it; the story, “Sex in Two Cities,” was optioned and made into a reality TV pilot for TBS

2003: Was hired as the dating expert on G4’s Attack of the Show, co-hosting a segment with Olivia Munn; started appearing on numerous other TV shows, including Red Eye, Showbiz Tonight, The CBS Morning Show, The Talk, The Insider, Hannity & Colmes and various other programs on Fox News, CNN, MSNBC, NBC, VH1, MTV and E

2007: Published a “Modern Love” in The New York Times

2007: HarperCollins published my first novel, Party Girl, and Sony optioned the movie rights 

2007: Started getting press, some of it even good

2009: HarperCollins published my second novel, Bought 

2010: Started speaking at colleges about addiction and recovery

2010: HarperCollins published my first anthology, Reality Matters

2010: Hired as the editor of The Fix, the first addiction recovery-focused website 

2011: HarperCollins published my memoir Falling for Me

2013: Simon & Schuster published the book I wrote with Tom Sizemore (RIP), By Some Miracle I Made It Out of There; the book sold so many copies that it hit The New York Times bestseller list

2014: Created the AfterPartyMagazine website, which included a podcast and storytelling show, and sold it to the owners of The Fix

2014: Soft Skull published my second anthology, True Tales of Lust and Love

2017: Spoke alongside Tony Robbins at the Genius Network Annual Event

2017: Left AfterParty, floundered for a bit

2018: Spoke at three different TEDx events 

2018: Created the company now called Legacy Launch Pad Publishing

2018: Released our first book, Aiming High, and watched the author/our client land a six-figure spokesperson deal, add hundreds of thousands of dollars to his company's bottom line and launch a lucrative speaking career. Went, "Huh, a book can really transform any entrepreneur's career, no matter their business! Oh, and traditional publishing is archaic!"

2018: Created and launched courses on writing and launching books 

2018: Released the Party Girl audio book; sold the Party Girl movie rights to Martin Scorsese's producer

2019: Signed dozens of clients at Legacy Launch Pad and began launching a steady stream of books

2020: Created a membership program for writers, which has launched dozens of debut authors

2020: Released Make Your Mess Your Memoir, which landed me an appearance on Good Morning America and brought in hundreds of thousands of dollars in new business

2020: Switched the focus of my podcast to book launches

2021: Got the rights to Party Girl back from HarperCollins and re-launched it, adding new talent to the movie in development and taking over an iconic Hollywood corner with it 

2021: My boyfriend Jim Agnew and I acquired Bernie the wonder cat

2022: Became a contributor on the topic of using books to build a business for Fast Company and Entrepreneur and signed on to be the book critic for KATU TV/Portland

2022: Watched a Legacy Launch Pad book hit the #1 spot on the Wall Street Journal bestseller list

2023: Launched Legacy Launch Pad's 50th book